The Readiness Is All
by Saturn's Spawn
Summary: There was clarity in the moments he lived with her. He could not find it anywhere else. SMDN crossover Hotaru/L


Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon or Death Note.

"And the world kept moving, not toward any goal, just going, because that's what life does, as Kong Fu Zi says. And it's bound to be better with a companion who knows how to be tender, a companion you may grow to cherish."

- from Bound

In the early days, when he still lived at Wammy's house, L remembered seeing a green-haired woman visiting the orphanage. She was an acquaintance of Watari. He watched as Watari whispered something to the little girl holding the woman's hand. The little girl looked in L's direction before turning back to Watari with a small smile.

The five-year-old L eyed the girl suspiciously as she started to walk toward him.

With a smile, she offered her hand, "Hello. My name is Hotaru. What's yours?"

L's gaze drifted from her outstretched hand to her expectant gaze. The gesture was foreign to him; however, he knew enough about common courtesy to answer her question. "I am L," he replied simply.

Hotaru giggled for a moment. "That's a strange name."

"Why?"

"It's only a letter."

"So?"

"Well, it wouldn't be good if people only had a letter for a name because there's only twenty-six letters in the alphabet."

From that day on, L questioned everything around him, but he was still miffed that the girl thought his name was strange, even though it wasn't his actual name.

--

"You cheated." Hotaru accused as she packed the game away. L sat in front of her with a smug smile on his face as he savored the sweet slice of cake he won.

"You should know by now, Hotaru. I really hate to lose." He took a bite of the strawberry that lay conspicuously on top of the cake's white frosting. She only shook her head, slightly amused, as the corners of her mouth tilted upward in a small smile.

Then she pulled a mystery book out from her backpack. It became a small tradition of theirs whenever Setsuna brought Hotaru along to Wammy's house; Hotaru and L would always find time to read a book with a difficult mystery, normally solved by an unexpected way each time.

Sometimes, L would mummer side comments about what he would do differently. Hotaru knew most of the time he was speaking to himself, but she didn't mind at all.

L decided that he liked mysteries. The kinds that interested him usually kept him busy for hours on end, but he would always find a way to solve them. Yet, he never figured out why he was so mystified by the color violet.

--

"She's still not answering your calls?" Even L couldn't tell that Watari was amused with the situation he found himself in. "Care to explain exactly what happened?"

"I was a bit preoccupied with something on my mind. There was a famous model or someone on the television, and Hotaru asked if I found whoever it was attractive."

"And what answer did you give?"

"An honest one. By society's standard, she was attractive or else she wouldn't be a model." He tried to justify himself, but even he couldn't be fooled by that answer.

Watari smiled. "Try again." With that being said, he picked up the empty plates and left the room.

Dubiously, L dialed her number once again. He was surprised that she answered this time. "Hello."

"Are you still angry with me?"

He heard a sigh. "Honestly? I don't think I could stay mad at you."

"Is that so?" He absentmindedly started twisting the telephone cord around his finger.

"It's not that I was mad about your answer—I still am, mind you—it's just…it was so expected."

"Expected?" He didn't anticipate that answer.

"You as equally honest as you are dishonest. It's frustrating at times."

"So you'd rather I be dishonest then?"

"No."

"You want me to be honest?" Which didn't make any sense because being honest was what made her angry in the first place.

"No…yes…I don't know."

"So fickle."

"See! It's that kind of honesty that I can do without."

"Perhaps it would be better if the world was filled with good people. Just honest people."

"If everyone in the world was good, you'd be bored out of your mind because there'd be no cases to solve."

L chuckled. "If it makes you feel better, just because I know society finds her attractive, doesn't mean she's attractive to _me_."

On the other side of town, Hotaru stared incredulously at her phone. Smiling, she put the phone to her ear and said, "So tell me about your next case…"

--

"The world's best detective. Congratulations," Hotaru smiled. She was sitting on her couch, whereas he was crouching in that strange manner of his. On one of the days when he wasn't working on a case, she had invited him over to watch an old black and white movie.

"People are going to start wondering about my identity." He stated idly as he watched, unmoved when the two main characters kissed during one scene. "I thought about creating a few aliases for myself."

"What for?" Hotaru looked up at him, concerned as always for his wellbeing.

"I don't have the time, or even the interest for that matter, to keep others from trying to find out who I am. Naturally, people are going to go for the second or third best detective to do some research on me. It's just easier and cleaner that way for people."

"The most anti-social person I know and you still know how people act outside gray walls." She mocked lightly. Nibbling on some popcorn that she prepared, Hotaru only shook her head in jest. Then she looked up at him with a smile. "How about Bob?"

"Bob?" Then he started chuckling quietly to himself.

"Charlie?"

"Desmund." He countered. It was turning into a game.

"Eli."

"Jaque."

"Pen."

"Rolden."

"Eraldo." She said haughtily. He bit the tip of his thumb, a habit he had developed over the years when he was thinking about something.

"Coil?"

Hotaru tilted her head to the side before testing the name on her tongue, "Eraldo Coil?"

--

Her friends at school had convinced her to go out on a date with a classmate of hers. He dismissed the prickling sensation inside him when she admitted that she had a wonderful time.

He decided that now would be a good time to start a new investigation.

"How busy are you going to be?" She asked curiously, before eating a spoonful of vanilla ice cream.

"I don't think this case will take too long." He replied, mirroring her action.

-

He certainly had the means to make this man disappear off the face of the earth. The only problem was that Minoru made Hotaru smile. He picked up his phone and dialed the number of Hotaru's cell phone.

"Hello?"

"Watari's on his way to pick you up."

"Oh! Um…" He could tell she was getting ready for another date.

"Please? I'll give you a strawberry." A pregnant pause followed. L could just tell she was wavering between going out with her boyfriend and meeting with her best friend.

"All right."

He didn't have to wait very long. Hotaru let herself in. She looked very nice wearing a black dress.

"L, is everything okay?" Always worried about him.

"You should try to be a little bit more selfish." He played with the tiny cups of cream, stacking them on top of one another.

"What?" She seemed more baffled than agitated that he would ask her to leave her date only to tell her this.

"Worrying about yourself is just as important as worrying about others." He pulled out an envelope from a file cabinet. "Just a piece of advice."

"How very magnanimous of you." She responded dryly as she took a seat next to him. "You owe me a strawberry."

Still stacking the small cream containers, L handed her an envelope. She opened it to find pictures of Minoru with different woman in each photograph. In one picture, he was wearing the shirt she had bought for him. She smiled faintly.

"What are you going to do to him?"

If he was caught off guard by her question, it didn't show on his face, "Minoru is cheating on you and you're asking what _I'm_ going to do to _him_? So unselfish."

"Despite how meticulous you are, there's always that slim chance that people will found out it was you." She was still concerned for him.

L stared at her intently. "Then, at the very least, stop seeing him."

"What, I shouldn't give him a chance to redeem himself in my eyes? Shouldn't I hear his side of the story?"

He leaned forward until his face was inches away from hers. "No."

--

Hotaru knew L worked best in the shadows where no one could catch him. If it wasn't for Watari, who often worked as a messenger for them, Hotaru thought she would never see her friend again.

She heard the speculations and the rumors over L's identity. Some glorified him as a savior helping to rid crime from the world. Others called him a vigilante and nothing more.

Hotaru smiled as she watched the world around her from her corner of the patio outside her favorite café. L was just a man whose hobby happened to be solving mysteries. It was all a game, he once told her, and if truth be told, he was a cheater and a liar, using whatever means he had to win.

And he was her best friend.

As she read the newspaper, searching for any signs of a crime that might entice L's interest, a man wearing a leather coat appeared in front of Hotaru, who sat far enough in the back that no one noticed her.

The violet eyed young woman smiled as she placed her newspaper down. "Hello, Watari."

The old man smiled in return and surreptitiously placed a small piece of paper on the table. Hotaru read the note and nodded before handing Watari a bag of cookies that came with her coffee. "Could you give these to him? And tell him that the doctor told me that as long as a person uses his or her brain to burn calories, it's okay to have sweets." Never mind the strange look she received from the doctor when she asked him.

Watari smiled again, "That shouldn't be a problem for him now, will it?" With a nod of his head, he said his farewells and left with the bag of cookies in hand. Once Watari was out of sight, Hotaru re-read the note written in L's distinct handwriting, which others would call at times his illegible scrawl.

_**My newest case is taking longer than I had originally thought, but I should be done before the end of this week. Happy Anniversary.**_

She smiled. Fifteen years ago on this day, Hotaru met her best friend.

--

Apparently, meeting Setsuna was not enough. Hotaru's adopted mother and _father_ were adamant in meeting her best friend. He could have refused. In fact, logically, he should have. For anonymity's sake, the less people who were aware of his identity was better; however, he surprised both her and himself by acquiescing to her request.

He stared at the passing scenery outside from behind tinted windows; he was thankful that no one could see his face. He sighed as if he were meeting his impending doom.

"You're going to get wrinkles." Soft fingers touched his chin and turned his head so that he was facing her. "Thank you. For agreeing to meet my parents." She pulled her hand back to her side.

L didn't tell her that he immediately missed her touch.

"Isn't it your filial duty to introduce someone important to you to your parents?"

"Isn't your duty as my best friend to cater to my every whim?" She countered. With a more sincere voice, she added. "Haruka-papa isn't unkind. Interrogating you isn't going to kill you."

"I am aware of that. It's in every father figure's nature to at least try to intimidate someone like me. After all, I am technically an unemployed, lying, cheating, sore loser who happens to be the best friend your Haruka-papa's only little girl."

She smiled. "That you are. It makes me wonder what you would do if you ever had a daughter." She stroked her chin in contemplation. "You'd probably investigate the history of every young man that poor girl brings to meet you only to find that one detail that makes him unworthy."

"Are you offering?"

"Eh?"

"Are you offering to be the mother of my hypothetical child?"

Hotaru shook her head, a furious blush across her face, as she frantically waved her hands in front of her.

"Then you don't have to worry about my having a 'poor girl.'"

The hidden meaning was not lost to Hotaru.

--

At midnight L blew out a single candle on a slice of cake while on the other side of town, two minutes after midnight, Hotaru chewed the piece of cake in her mouth slowly.

L meticulously tore the brown paper off the package. He laughed when he saw the bottle of stain remover. The promise from the manufacturer on the label guaranteed to remove coffee stains from even a white shirt.

Underneath it was a small plastic container shaped like a pumpkin that was filled with an assortment of candy. There was also a note that read, _**Happy Birthday/Halloween**_!

--

"Kira?" It became the topic their discussion as they waited for Watari to bring the food. Hotaru vaguely remembered the mention of Kira from her co-workers at the hospital.

"It's an unprecedented case. Kira's victims all die from heart attacks, making them seem like normal deaths. However, his 'power' seems to be limited." L seemed more concerned with being able to balance his fork on his finger, but Hotaru knew that this was going to be his most challenging case.

"Limited?"

"The only victims that die are those who have been broadcasted through the news or the internet. Those whose names were spelled wrong or were not publically broadcasted did not die."

Watari brought cake for L and soba noodles for Hotaru.

"Sounds terrifying," Hotaru remarked.

"Of course, I can't really prove any of it until my experiment works."

"Experiment?"

"You should know by now, Hotaru. I really hate to lose."

--

Twelve F.B.I agents died.

He had hoped it wouldn't come to this, but there was no other alternative; he had to show himself to the Kira investigators. He chose not to tell her until a few days before the entrance exam.

"You could die!" Tear-stricken violet eyes bothered him more than he cared to admit. "Why would you take the risk?"

L looked away. It was true; he never faced anything like the Kira case, but that would not stop him from trying. Surely, Hotaru knew him well enough to know that. "Kira must be stopped—"

"Do you know just how much the idea alone of a world without L scares me?" Dark bangs hid her gaze from him, but she was visibly shaking. She was crying for him. He realized she'll probably be the only one to do so.

In an unprecedented move, he pulled her toward him, surprising both Hotaru and himself. Caught off guard, Hotaru stood in front L with her hands on top of the white cotton of his shirt. Tears still streaked her face unknowingly. Now, it was his hair that shadowed his eyes, hiding his gaze from her. "I'll be fine."

Closing her eyes, she touched her forehead to his. He was never that much taller than her because he slouched when he stood.

"Are you lying?"

--

"Can I ask you something, Ryuuzaki?"

On the balcony of the hotel, where no one could see his face because he was up so high, L turned to face the chief of police, Souichiro Yagami. The others were inside, discussing what to do with Amane now that there was evidence that connected her to the second Kira.

"Of course." He didn't want to argue over whether Light was Kira or not on this particular evening.

"Aside from not wanting to lose, why do you do so much for this case?"

He didn't hesitate to answer. "Because, to protect those important to me, I will do whatever it takes. I will bring Kira to justice." Perhaps his answer was the reason Souichiro was more inclined to listen to him than the others; he trusted the chief not to reveal his reason to anyone.

--

After the confinement, L moved the investigation team to a new headquarters that he built.

L watched Light and Misa's interactions. Even though he knew Light didn't love Misa, L still envied their closeness while he could only visit Hotaru occasionally.

However, he knew that she understood his reason for doing so. It was dangerous, especially if Light was Kira, and there was a ninety-five percent chance he was, according to L. If nothing else, his staying away from her kept her safe.

He stabbed the spoon into the cake to distract himself when Misa ran up to Light. He could only be patient.

Justice would prevail in the end.

--

The cogs and gears were turning constantly in the clock tower nearby. At noon time, the low toll of the bell resonated throughout the area. She put it off as a mere stomach ache, but when the killings started to happen again after Higuchi's death, Hotaru started to worry.

--

He knew that something was going to happen. He just didn't quite know what it was. For this reason, L chose to spend a few nights with Hotaru instead of at headquarters. The others didn't question him, but he could see it in their eyes.

That is how he found himself crouching in his peculiar manner next to Hotaru, who lay awake on her side. Papers from the investigation littered his side of the bed, but he didn't pay attention to any of it.

"Did you know you kept me human?" He confessed that evening. "Watari asked Miss Setsuna to bring you to Wammy's house so that I wouldn't turn out entirely reclusive."

"I'm not surprised, yet you're still the most anti-social person I know."

"I think you just insulted me," he hypothesized. Hotaru smiled before turning to look at the clock. It was a little past midnight, yet she couldn't sleep. Instead, she opted to tap her fingers on the cotton sheets in an effort to distract herself. "What do you intend to do if I died?"

All movements froze as he waited on baited breath for her answer, "Do you intend to die?"

"Hypothetically…if I were to die, what are you going to do?"

She sat up, using her arms to support her. "Ideally, I would grieve, but eventually move on with my life. I would probably find someone else. Someone who told the truth, didn't resort to less-than-honorable means, and accepted loss gracefully."

"You make me sound like I'm the evil one."

"I said 'ideally'. Truthfully, I have a horrible proclivity to geniuses with an unnatural addiction to sweets and solving mysteries for no other reason than to assuage his boredom." She leaned back until her head touched the pillow.

"Of course, this is contingent on my being dead." He made it sound as if this was their last conversation.

"When this case is over, we should celebrate with cake."

"Strawberry shortcake." He looked at her strangely, "You won't leave." It was a statement, not a question.

"You aren't going to try to convince me to move on? To try to have a normal life with a normal husband?"

"You won't leave."

"So, not only are you a lying, cheating sore loser, you're also a very selfish being."

He nodded, unable to deny her accusation.

"Good."

--

"_What are you doing, Ryuuzaki?" Light asked over the rain. L looked at him strangely before looking up at the sky._

"_Oh, I'm not doing anything in particular. It's just… I hear the bell."_

"_The bell?"_

"_Yes. The sound of the bell has been unusually loud today."_

"_I don't hear anything."_

"_Really…You can't hear it? It's been ringing nonstop all day. I find it very distracting. I wonder if it's a church. Maybe a wedding or perhaps a…"_

_-_

As Hotaru listened to the rain beating against the glass window of her apartment, the cup of coffee and the slice of strawberry shortcake remained untouched. She sat at her kitchen table quietly, staring blankly at the empty seat across from her.

--

The shrill ringing of the telephone resonated throughout the small apartment. Hotaru Tomoe, now thirty years-old, had just finished washing her dishes when the phone started to ring. A great weight pressed heavily against her chest as she picked it up. "Hello?"

"Miss Hotaru? This is Near. We found L's killer."

She stared at the phone dazedly during the pregnant pause that followed the young detective's statement.

"Thank you, Near."

Slowly, she pressed the end button and placed the phone on the table in the living room. Outside, she could hear the church bells ringing, and, without a word, she walked over to her kitchen table and sat down before she finished her coffee.

In the briefest moment, she smelled the scent of cake from L's favorite bakery.

End


End file.
